What if?
by Dark's Lady
Summary: What if Charles managed to have Erik come back to the mansion with him? What if the beach!divorce never happened? What would be the events that followed, and how would the unavoidable split between the two actually, and eventually, happen?


_**What If? **_

**Ch 1:**

**Happiness Begins with a Crisis**

There was _good _in Erik.

Charles knew this with every ounce of his being. "Erik," He said as he watched the missiles turn there direction back towards the ships. He could hear the terrified thoughts of his teammates as they all began to comprehend Erik's intention. "_Erik_," Charles said with more confidence, instinctively sending a shove telepathically towards Erik's mind. However the helmet kept Charles crippled, rendering his telepathic ability useless. He could hear the alarmed thoughts of the men on the ships as they noticed the missiles in mid air, hovering.

"Erik, do not allow yourself to be controlled by your anger and hatred! " Charles said with as much calm as he could muster. The thoughts of everyone around him; the raw fear he felt, was overwhelming. And he didn't have the strength to shield his mind. Feeling a sudden wave of nausea, he placed two hands on his knees to steady himself, taking deep breaths. He tried to calm his mind so he could control the endless stream of thoughts, but it was no use. The ordeal with Shaw had rendered every line of defense that Charles had, useless. He had never before felt so completely, and utterly open.

"ERIK! They are just taking orders! There is no reason to kill them!" Charles all but yelled at the man; the emotions of the several individuals taking their toll on Charles' emotional stability. But for the first time, Erik turned to look at him, and Charles all but froze at the sadness and pleading for help, deep within Erik's eyes. It was in this instant that Charles understood that this was not a man without hope,

This was a _child_ begging for hope. A child who had lived through atrocities and was surviving the only way he knew how. This was a child pleading for someone to save him, to tell him everything was going to be ok. To tell him that he didn't need to fight. Someone to give him a reason to stop what he was about to do.

"…Too long have I been at mercy of men who were just following orders. Never again!" Erik all but whispered the words that were strongly accented with his German heritage. His desperate eyes turned from Charles and focused once again on the missiles in the air.

"Erik! Don't do this!_ Yes_, they are afraid of us! But you must understand that Shaw was using his powers to deliberately provoke them!" Charles said frantically. Erik's hand was outstretched, and with a flick of his wrist, the missiles began to move towards the ships. Raven gasped in horror, and the thoughts of the sailors rose in intensity. Charles gritted his teeth.

"Set the missiles down, Erik!" Charles said, speaking with determination. "What exactly do you think will be accomplished by throwing missiles at them? You will only be demonstrating their fears are _true_ and that mutants cannot be trusted! Killing them will be seen as an act of war!" Charles said, but Erik showed no signs of consideration. "_ERIK!_ You are endangering all mutants and humans alike! And for what, my friend, your _hatred_?" Charles suddenly felt an overwhelming desire to just _tackle_ Erik and take the bloody helmet off by force. But he quickly realized this was Hank's desire, not his own and he suppressed it as best he could. If he was to persuade Erik, it would have to be done without resorting to Erik's mental mindset of handling things. "You are _better_ than this Erik. But killing these men will show to them, _and to me_, that you are no different than Shaw!"

Erik flinched at the mentioning of Shaw's name and the missiles stopped midflight, some dropping to the water as Erik's concentration flickered. For a moment, there was utter silence. It was a moment in which all thoughts and minds seemed to pause, trying to take in what was happening. However this did not last long. The thoughts swiftly increased in force, as there was a sudden flurry of confusion that engulfed the sailor's minds. Charles inhaled sharply as pain spiked through his head and he reflexively placed two fingers to his temple to try and suppress the thoughts. He only succeeded to an extent, several thoughts still leaking through the weak dam he had built as a crude attempt for protection. It was just a makeshift defense, and would have to be strengthened later.

Erik's outstretched hand dropped to his side, but most of the missiles still hovered dangerously above the ocean. With cold, yet conflicted eyes, Erik turned and focused on Charles, watching as the man quickly straightened himself and dropped his hand that had previously been placed to his temple. Had Charles just compared him to Shaw? There was something in Erik's chest that tensed at the thought of Charles seeing him as nothing more than Shaw, and anger exploded through him so powerfully that some of the missiles in the air detonated. The rage consumed him and he took a step towards Charles, a low growl emanating from his voice. Charles instinctively took a step backwards.

"How _dare _you compare me to Shaw," Erik said, the sinister undertone in his voice not eluding Charles' sharp ability to read people. Charles noted out of the corner of his eyes more missiles falling as Erik's mental stability faded with anger.

"How dare you compare me to Shaw!" Erik repeated, outraged by the insult. "You know _nothing_ of who I am! You have no _idea_ of the things I've been through, the pain I have felt! The pain I _feel_. How dare you Charles! You know nothing! And you dare to compare me to that monster?" Erik said pointing to the body that lay limply on the beach. "That man _murdered_ people for _fun_, Charles! He tortured me because he _liked_ it! Charles, wir sind die besseren menschen. Warum konnen Sie nicht verstehen?"

"You think I don't know the things that you went through? For god's sake Erik I was _inside_ Shaw's head! I felt the sadistic thrill that pulsed through his body as he realized you were going to kill him! I saw the images of what he did to you!" Charles replied angrily.

"_You _were a spoiled brat Charles. You've never even _experienced_ real pain! What it _feels _like to be sliced open, day after day. And then the blessed time where nobody touches you, allowing your body to heal, just to be stripped from you as they slice you open again! You've never felt real hunger, where you're so hungry you've accepted that you're going to die!" His eyes were full of pain, yet his voice was riddled in rage. All the while Charles face was flushed, his eyes darting all over the place. Occasionally Charles eyes would focus on him, but then soon would dart over to the team or over to the ships. It only made Erik feel more anger, and the missiles dangled dangerously in the air.

Charles sighed, ignoring the thoughts that flooded his mind as best he could. "You're right, Erik. I've never experienced what you've been through, and I can only hope to never have to experience such terrible, debilitating circumstances for myself. But you must understand that Shaw is _dead_, Erik. For too long you have allowed your hatred and anger to control you in your quest for revenge. But what you are about to do," Charles said pointing towards the missiles, "is no longer justified by your need for revenge. Instead it will be seen as an act of rage that only Shaw can be compared to—"

"God damn it, Charles!" Erik said furiously, and the metal of the Submarine groaned at Erik's uncontrolled ability. "I am NOT Shaw! My whole life has been about _not_ being Shaw! About killing him so he can't hurt anymore people!"

"What you're about to do will _hurt_ people!" Charles said, rage that was not his own coloring his voice. How could Erik be so blind?

"Don't you understand that what you're about to do is exactly what Shaw wanted? This is exactly what Shaw would have done! Of _course_ you're not Shaw! I know that better than anyone! But it's your actions right now, in this moment, that will define _who_ you will be tomorrow. _You are not Shaw._ But what you are about to do follows the _action_ of what a person _like_ Shaw _would do_!" Charles said, and Erik's anger recoiled at the comprehension of Charles' words. The realization hit Erik hard, and the world around him suddenly seemed very bright as he became overwhelmingly conscious of everything. Slowly, he felt his anger melt and the missiles in the air began to fall, one after another.

Oh, Erik thought. _Oh._

Charles continued. "Erik, you will be hurting people," He said, pleading in his eyes and in his voice. "You will be hurting _me_." Erik looked into Charles deep blue eyes and felt a pang in his chest. His anger melted away almost instantly and his hold on the missiles slipped.And as they fell, this deep understanding pounded through Erik. What Charles had said made sense, but he intellectually failed to put words to his experience of understanding. What Erik perhaps could never express, was the utter relief in realizing that Charles didn't see _him_ as Shaw. Charles _knew_ Erik wasn't Shaw. But then why did he call him Shaw? _No._ Charles had just said that his _actions_; killing people, would define him as Shaw. 

Wait a minute.

Erik was about to kill the people on the ship?

This awareness of his actions hit Erik rigidly, and what seemed like minutes passed as Erik fumbled over the newly attained truth he had discovered. He was about to kill hundreds of people without thinking twice about it.  
>The rest of the missiles fell to the water.<p>

"Erik," Charles said softly. Erik's head lifted to meet Charles soft gaze; his blue eyes full of compassion and understanding.

"My friend, you are capable of many great things. You have the power to choose whoever you wish to be. But you _must_ understand that killing does not bring you peace. Killing Shaw, did not bring you peace. And by god Erik, I think peace is the one thing you deserve the most by now," Charles said evenly, and Erik's gaze which had fallen to the ground, snapped upwards again to meet Charles'.

Anger once again began to coarse through Erik. He couldn't help it. It had been the one thing that had fuelled him through most of his life. It had kept him alive and safe, and it had killed his one enemy, Shaw. So his anger couldn't be helped. It was a natural reaction. And once again, he felt anger towards Charles. He felt anger towards Moira and the CIA, and still, anger towards _Shaw_. The old anger for Shaw, was by far the most that resonated through him once again, but he also couldn't help feeling that new hatred for humanity; humanity who allowed monsters like Shaw to exist. The anger was uncontrollable. He felt himself plagued with anger towards the people that shot the missiles at them, he felt anger towards those stupid leather wearing teens just because they were _there_, and he hated Charles because he was so _right_ about everything. And everything Charles said was so insufferably simple that it riddled his brain with its complexity. This had always awed Erik. In moments of weakness, it helped to know Charles was by his side, and understood him so completely that he knew him better than Erik knew himself.

Charles stepped closer to Erik, feeling it was now safe to approach him. He could see the hardware inside Erik's mind working overtime. For the first time in several agonizing moments, Charles released a breath that he hadn't realized he was holding. So much had happened in the past 4 minutes. But it had felt like hours. Charles became conscious of the fact that he must have been speaking at lightning speed, and though the thoughts of others continued to bombard his brain, he stayed keenly focused on Erik and the progress that was being made, regardless of the angry scowl that was plastered across Erik's face.

"Erik, you are not Shaw," Charles repeated slowly, emphasizing each word. "Shaw is dead. You no longer have to be angry. Not towards me, not towards others. And most importantly, you no longer have to be angry at _yourself_," Charles said, and Erik's features softened.

He no longer had to be mad at himself? Who made Charles think that he was mad at himself? It was everyone else he was mad at! Why could nobody see that he was mad at everyone else who just didn't _understand? _He looked Charles in the eyes. "They are going to kill mutants. They hate us. And more will hate us as word spreads of our existence.

Shaw was right; it will be us, or them." Erik said softly, with hardly the amount of vigor that once filled his presence. He diverted his gaze, as for some reason it felt too confronting to look into Charles' searching stare that was trying to read Erik's mind, regardless of the helmet that prevented such ability.

Charles quirked a small smile. "I like to believe differently, my friend. I like to believe in a future where humans and mutants peacefully co-exist with one another. And I like to believe that this future will be made possible with your help, Erik," Charles said placing a firm hand on Erik's shoulder.

"You need to trust in a world that is struggling to find peace. Because if you set yourself as an example for others to follow, people will learn, that true peace begins here," Charles said calmly, motioning to Erik's heart by placing a hand on his chest that was tense with the stress of preceding events. "You cannot get angry at others for being the way that they are. Because if you do so, you miss the subtle beauty of whom they could be, and who you could make them become. My dear friend, give humanity a chance. And give me the possibility to show you a world that you have never seen," Charles said firmly. Erik's eyes, for the first time since training where he moved the satellite with Charles, opened to show a whirl wind of emotions. Confusion, sadness, excitement, love, fear, and the pleading hope that Charles was right, yet also the resentment towards everything that was being said.

"My friend, allow me to teach you how to accept, and love yourself for who you are. So that you can no longer live afraid or angry at yourself and others; but instead so you can live to enjoy life, and love others for all that they are; even as flawed as they come," Charles' said with a hint of a grin at what he last said. Erik was definitely, as flawed and broken as they come.

"Allow me to give you something to live for, Erik. But in order for me to do so, you have to trust that I will never hurt you. You have to trust _me_," Charles said stressing his words, but still speaking calmly as his blue gaze pierced Erik's hazel one.

In that moment, all thoughts in Charles' head, that were swimming around and constantly threatening Charles' composure seemed to vanish, as Erik and Charles shared a moment that was not polluted by the past, or the future. In this moment, the two men saw deeper than the physical realm allows, and a bond of true friendship was born. A friendship that went intuitively farther than the taught normalcy of manners that society deemed a friendship. Something was created in that instant, that rooted deeper between the two of them than what was possible to be explained by words.

Eric slowly removed the helmet from his head, and handed it towards Charles in a gesture of trust.

Charles gave a faint smile, before the world began become hazy, then black, and his balance slipped beneath him. The last thing he heard was Erik yelling his name.

**Author's Note**

**I have struggled for months with trying to find a plausible way for the dynamic duo to stay together and NOT experience a 'beach!divorce.' And yes, I know this chapter is really farfetched. And yes, I know it's not really well written (I'll come back of the weeks and fix that). I just needed to post it because I've been struggling with it so much. Just pretend the first chapter doesn't matter. Because it's the rest of the story that I have planned which will be really, really good ;) **

**And believe me when I say I have spent HOURS planning and running through things in my head. I went through about a hundred different beach scene scenarios and none of them were as plausible as this; or, Charles tackles Erik and takes off the helmet (but that ruins character dynamics), or the fact that the beach scene just never happened. So basically I'm telling you, for the sake of my own sanity, just live with the mediocre…ness of this first chapter ;) Hey, that's what fanfiction is for…right?**

**ALSO (yes yes…I know I'm ranting) I am debating on whether to keep Charles and Erik friends, or making this into a Charles/Erik fic. What do you think? **

**German Translation: **Charles, wir sind die besseren menschen. Warum konnen Sie nicht verstehen!" **(Charles, we are the better men! Why can you not understand?)**

**Please Review! :)**


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